Greetings and salutations, welcome
to the sixth (!) annual I’m Right Awards!
I can’t believe I’ve been doing this stupid thing for six years now,
you’d figure eventually I’d get a
life. Well, you’d be wrong about that,
and probably other stuff too, ya dummy. (The
last few months have taught me that apparently insulting people makes you
popular, so I’m trying it out. See, e.g., Trump v. Bush). Meanwhile, I’m right, about movies at least.
The rules are pretty much unchanged
from the last couple of years: I’m going to run through and give my own five
nominees and winners for all of the traditional Oscar film categories, with a
few little tweaks. I’ve removed the categories that I don’t have an opinion
about, due to either a) not having scene (m)any, like Best Documentary, or b) I
don’t care about, like Best Makeup and Hairstyling. But I am a just and benevolent god, and for
every category I’ve taken away, I’ve added one of my own (okay not quite, I didn't replace the three shorts categories). These new categories
are mostly the same as they’ve been the last couple of years, but there are a
few tweaks, and I’m trying out a brand new one.
Hooray!
All of this is, of course, only in
my own humble opinion…though I am right. It says so in the title.
And, without much further ado…the
Pauls!
